In my seasons of pain and struggle, reaching out to those I thought I could find direction and strength in, many times I was given the same churchy cliches and one-liners I had come to abhor. I can remember sitting in one such session, listening without being fully present, my mind wandering off into my uncertain future again….And I remember thinking, “I wonder if there is a real person with real, meaningful words beneath that robotic facade? I wonder if pain is present? I wonder if it may be stored nicely in a hidden compartment in that shell? But I really wonder what they could tell me right now that could absolutely rock my world…if they could just be honest…and real…and vulnerable?”
God would see to it that with time, tables would turn, positions would change. He decided in His providence to put me on the other side of the desk. Now there are moms and dads, sons and daughters, leaders and followers, lost and found….who sit before me, some hoping for one sentence they can take away from the moment to use as thread…something, anything, to hold on to.
Here’s a little something I have committed to, and I thought I’d share it with you. It’s connected to a principle I decided to live by the day I met grace. I told God that day, “If you will save me from all this, I will use every failure and every victory to help somebody else.” So while I cannot boast of a perfect life…I can boast in the power of His grace and mercy. I need it and rely on it every moment of every day.
If you are in the business of helping people, I pray this helps.
When helping people…always give it your very best effort…share your heart…be real and authentic and open and vulnerable.
Yes, vulnerable.
When lives are in the balance, my pride and ego and personal agendas cannot be present. I will share the wounds of my heart that I strive so hard to mask…if there’s a small chance it may give someone else a thread of life to cling to.
It is in the gorgeous revelation that we have more in common than not…the profound pains we bear, the strenuous struggles we fight, the old, yet still stinging tender spots on our hearts, the cavernous aches and loneliness that threatens to suck us in to that dark place…that crucial perception can be gained.
For there is something powerful and peaceful and life-giving in knowing you are not alone. A deep strength comes from knowing we are not so different.
vonnie lopez 
This is so true! Do all to the Glory of GOD!
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Ms. Lopez,in a 5 yr span I had colon cancer. Six weeks later I had a bowel ubstructuction (another surgery) one mt later started a 3 mts of chemo. A year later my daughter died. A yr later I was diagnosed with MS. Two years later I I was told..oh no MS….a dislocated hip. Got to 222 lbs from steroids. I do not listen to ANYONE who has no balance of pain, tears and yet commune with God daily for direction. I know who carried me. And when I share that with people and they get lost in their emotions and are saying “I am so. sorry” I’m like why???? Didn’t you just hear my testimony💚💚💚
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